Jesus is in the Country

This post is two-pronged. 

Three if you count me telling you I do not intend to follow my Friday Confessions schedule today because I simply have not kept track of myself this week.  (Not that I don't have anything to confess, which I'm sure I do...)

So let me start out by saying I am not cut out for the country.  As much as I say I want a farm house with a billion acres to take care of my retired racehorses, alpacas and chickens, I will not survive in that life.

Last night I went to a Bible study out in Argyle, which is also known as the middle of stinkin' nowhere.  It's farm country, and in farm country they don't believe in street lights.  Although, in the daylight it's probably the prettiest scene you'll ever see.  Rolling fields with snow covered peaks in the background...but I digress.

So there I go with my phone's Google map leading me to the girl's house.  I follow my little arrow and with only two turn-arounds and the dang thing taking me to the neighbor's house I finally made it.  We had a lovely time together with cranberry bars at the end (goodbye wellness plan).  People started to leave and a couple of girls who were from the area asked if I would be able to find my way out.

Famous almost last words, "Oh yeah, I'm good at finding my way back, plus I have my phone map."

I pull out of the driveway and head down the road.  My phone has no signal now.  It shows my location on a grid with no landmarks or street names.  No problem, I think.  I take the left, and then another left, and another one, and then....

Wait...was I supposed to take a right?

...

This doesn't look at all familiar.

...

Why are those trees laughing at me?

...

Did I cross a bridge to get here??

...

Ohmigosh where am I??

...

Why isn't this phone working?!

...

Turn around, yes I should definitely turn around.

And there I was.  Lost.

This is when I knew I was not cut out for the country:

1. I am afraid of the dark, the country is dark.
2. Winter trees are super creepy.
3. Serial killers are definitely waiting for people like me behind those creepy trees.
4. I cannot live without cell service.

So there goes my Green Acres fantasy.

Now, as I was making my way back to what I thought was the right way and ended up being the complete wrong way I started to worry.  I knew I needed to head southwest but the roads were so curvy I could go both south and north within a half mile.

I started to cry.  "I just wanna go home!" I think I might have whined.  I knew eventually I would find my way out, but it was late, it was dark, I was tired, and I had no idea if I was going to get pooped out in Vermont or my back yard.

Then I prayed.  "Please just show me a way out of here!"  Let me tell you, people, I was as desperate as they come.  When I say I'm afraid of the dark, I am afraid of the dark.  I have to use a flash light to get to the fridge in the middle of the night.

I once sat completely still for 45 minutes with just my finger pushing buttons to make my cell phone light up when the power went out one night.  My parents were away and I could not force myself to get up and light some candles, or find a flashlight.  To say I am paralyzed by the dark is an understatement.

So anyway, here I am on the edge of a meltdown, praying my socks off when simultaneously I see a sign for Rt. 40 (my way out!) and I hear on the radio this part of a song, "...my savior's always there for me..."

Whoa.

God knew exactly what I needed when I needed it and didn't give it to me a minute sooner or later than he should have.  Thirty minutes after getting me out of the Argyle maze I was home and cozy in my jammies. 

I hope I never let myself forget again that He's got permanent shot gun.