A desperate plea

Dear Corey,

For goodness sake, please let me sleep. 

I realize it is soooo hilarious to wake me up five times in the middle of the night to listen to my awkward ramblings, I'd wake myself up if I knew I'd hear me yammering on about crackers and beluga whales (you know how sleep talking stories affect me), but this girlfriend needs her full eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.

I need to be able to keep my eyes open when I iron my pants, drive to work, talk to constituents, eat my lunch, use the facilities, play scrabble with Jill on my phone, and drive home again.  And I'm sure you'd prefer me to be awake during our special time.

You know, when we watch taped episodes of Restaurant Impossible.

Also worth mentioning: I'm downright grumpy and throw pillows at your face.

So, if you don't mind, leave me to my sleep.  And only interrupt if the house is on fire or the dog is doing that gaaarrummph thing before he pukes.

Thank you,
Stacie