Friday, May 25, 2012

The results are in....

Congrats to E and Betsy!*

You each won one of these beauts to wear for days at a time because they're so light you literally forget you're wearing it.

And Thank You to everyone who donated to my Relay For Life team...I reached my goal and we all did something pret-ty good.

Go ahead.  Pat yourself on the back.

And if you call yourself E and you chronicle your daily happenings in Portland, email me your address: staciejlucas(at)gmail(dot)com.

(Bets, I think I know where to find you!)

Keep on keepin' on!


*there were some commenting issues so I included everyone who donated.  period.

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Solving the world's problems one felt ball at a time

Off-topic: have you seen this dude, Flula, on Youtube yet?  I spent a good 25 minutes watching his videos and now everything I think has a German accent.

Google Flula and rock, paper, scissors.

Or Flula and Jennifer is a party pooper.

"Jennifer poops at parties?!"

But I digress.

People, you have just three days to donate to Relay For Life to find a cure for cancer!!

Oh, and to win one of these!

Click here and follow the directions to win one of two of these handmade, 100% merino wool necklaces from your's truly.  It's easy: after you click on the thing you go to a previous post, click on another link that takes you to my Relay page, donate some money, I'll scream "THANK YOU" all the way from upstate New York, then come back and leave a comment.

I guess you can leave the comment before you make the donation.  That would save us some time, wouldn't it?

Low entries so far, so there is a pret-ty good chance you're going to win.

And if I man say so, these necklaces are cool.

And, of course, cancer is really bad.

So go do your thing.

Tuesday, May 15, 2012


Friends, this is a day for the history books!

One that I will remember until I forget!!

A day that brings Corey & Stacie to the masses!!!


No really, this is huge.

Well, I mean it's huge for a certain population.

Like, um, those who are concerned about the appearance of their upper arm area.

But I'm sure that is soooo many people.

Try this (don't worry, it's 85% safe), Google "arm fat crease."  Who do you see??

Hmmm?  I'll give you a minute.



Who is it that pops up right under a probably very reputable and informational site on the subject of arm fat?!

It's this girl!!  So exciting.  On the subject of arm fat creases I have found my way up the ladder to the number two position of authority on the condition.  It's not something to take lightly, folks.  People look to me before they look to someone else after realizing that I am, in no way, a professional, and that is the highest form of flattery.

So today I'm going to give myself a little pat on the back, let myself know the journey to the top isn't over, and then set off to work on bringing "brownie turd" up to it's rightful number two spot.


Monday, May 14, 2012

About that dream...

Raise your hand if whenever you say "I had a dream last night..." you then sing "cuz it looked just like a dream" from the Romeo and Juliet soundtrack that you still listen to because it reminds you of the best movie of eighth grade even though you get all weepy because Leonardo DiCaprio dies at the end.

Me too.

So, I had a dream last night that I pooped on the couch.

Friday, May 11, 2012

Friday Confessions


1.  I haven't been skipping "Confessions" because I've been an angel the past few weeks.  I've been skipping "Confessions" because I was on vacation, and then I was getting ready for vacation, and then I just plain forgot.

2.  Phew.  Glad I got that off my chest.

3.  On Monday I took my car in to get inspected.  I noticed a few weeks ago that "February" was punched, as in that is when it expires.  After dropping it off I got a call from the repair shop:

"Uh, hey this is Bob from Warren Tire..."


"We pulled your car in for that inspection and, um, it was just inspected in February."


"Yeah, I mean, unless you want it inspected again, it's good until next year."

I completely forgot.  And not only did I forget, apparently I can't read either.  "February 2013" written on my sticker makes it pret-ty clear when I'm supposed to taker her in again.

4.  I was embarrassed.

5.  I was driving to the mall with my sister, Kimberlie, and we noticed a brightly decorated store called The Monogram Hut.

"Isn't that where they squish your boobs??"

6.  When stuff like that happens I make sure to call everyone I know.  I can't be the only one peeing my pants.

7.  Now I have to stop and actually think before I spell the word monogram. 

8.  I've honked at several people over the past few months for not yielding on the on-ramp.  I kept thinking, "that yield sign is so obvious, why do these people keep ignoring it?!?"

That sign is for my lane.

9.  I should probably have died at least seven times by now, the way I drive.  I play out this hilarious scenario in my head: so there's Jesus standing in Heaven and he's talking to these exhausted angels.  He's like, "guys, I know she's a train wreck," and they're going, "no Jesus, you don't get it, she puts her feet up on the vents to air out her toes,"  and then Jesus goes, "gross, I know, but you gotta keep on truckin', you know, because I need her later."

I have, like, 17 guardian angels where you probably only need one.

I'm not a good driver, is what I'm trying to say here.

10.  I just made Corey's day.  He's been saying this for years.

And speaking of Corey, he just had a birthday yesterday...Yay!


Happy Friday to all!  And don't forget you still have time to enter to win one of two necklaces made by me!  All you have to do is, you know, fight some cancer.  Go Here.

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Fight Cancer With ME!!

I wear sunscreen.

I don't smoke.

I exercise regularly.

I stand at least five feet away from the microwave when it's in action.

I avoid "mystery meats" and growth hormones.

I have good intentions to eat vegetables and other foods packed with vitamins and antioxidants.


I'm scared of cancer, is what I'm trying to say.

I try to avoid it like, well, cancer.

In my list of fears a diagnosis in myself or someone I love is definitely in my top six.

(The Dark is ahead only because it's one of those unavoidable things; it is going to be dark, and that is where serial killers live.)

It literally scares the pants right off of me.  If you said, "Hey, did you know wearing those pants causes cancer?" I would take them off.

And then I would harass you and your mom and your best friend and your neighbor to take all of your pants off too because it would hurt me to see you hurt.

Of course, we would need to find a pants alternative, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.

It's this persistent fear that calls me to act.  And to give.

Now, I don't have a lot to give, but I do have some money, and I have some time.  And I know people who have some money and some time too.  So we're getting together to find other people who have money and time....and I think you can see where this is going.

Give some money, people.  If you haven't already donated to a cancer organization, and there are many reputable charities out there, donate to my Relay For Life team.  We are the Super Hearted Heroes led by a survivor who won his battle against cancer.  (Yay!)

And as a thank you I'm giving away two of these felted wool necklaces in mint to two random folks who make a donation.*

I'm still working on a catchy slogan for my campaign.  I don't think "Felt Up For The Cure!" is gonna fit on a button.

Maybe a t-shirt.

So while I work on that, here is what you can do: go to this page, donate a few of your hard earned dollars (but let's make it a little worthwhile, people), come back here and leave a comment like "hey, gimme that necklace" or go simple with "I donated" or be a radical and tell me how cool I am.  Whatever floats your boat, as the cool-kids say.

Giveaway ends 5pm Eastern Time Friday, May 25 and I'll announce the winners ay-sap.

Let's Fight with Felt!!

hey, that just might work....

*necklaces are made by yours truly from 100% merino wool, so they won't be all rashy.  did you know merino sheep have the softest wool of all the sheep?  you're welcome.