10 days...

Here's a little advice for future brides.....



...um, guys you don't want to stick around for this...really, it's not pretty.



When you get near the one month mark,



for real, what are you still doing here?



Stop eating broccoli. Seriously, you are going to be anxious. Your stomach will be gurgly all on its own. It does not need added fuel to fire up the toot factory...if you know what I mean.



Oh, you don't?



Um, your stomach doesn't need any more air for the air horn.



More stink for the stink bomb.



A sharper knife to cut the cheese.



I hope that helps. Because that's as far as I can go without actually writing the f-a-r-t word and totally embarrassing myself.



So, um, back to my point: don't eat broccoli and stay downwind from your friends and family...especially if you are going to need them to roll 135 paper scrolls.