Wanted: Kitty Katt

I'm going to come right out and say it:  I need a kritter. 

A fuzzy little kritter that eats, drinks, and is excessively neurotic, like me.

Something I can chase around the table, bark at, maybe even snuggle with when no one's looking.

Just not a hamster or gerbil.  They look like furry turd chunks.

Or a guinea pig.  Too hairy, too paranoid.

I do like chinchillas, or as I call them: balls.

And I like squirrels, especially for dinner with a marmalade glaze and side salad.

But please no mice, rats, or raccoons.  Cute, scary, cute (respectively), but nasty scavengers.

I would prefer a meerkat, because they're fidgety like me and can sing.

But I could settle for a regular cat that sleeps all day and claws at my face.

Thank you,

Oliver