Wednesday, January 18, 2012

On Oliver and life's little adventures


My darling little Oliver-dog.

Mama's little tootie pie.

I believe I've had my last "kiss" from this mutt for a very, very long time.

You know what you did, Oliver.

You know how sometimes you find yourself in that "perfect storm" kind of scenario where your mouth is open mid-sentence just as your dog is jumping up to lick your chin where he found a dallop of ice cream the day before and you end up with a tongue all up in there?

Mmmhmmmm.

And then you get all grossed out but still semi-ok with it because "dogs have the cleanest mouths in town, for realz"?

Right, right.

But then there is a brief moment when you remember that time you caught him sampling cat doody and your insides curdle ever so slightly?

Yeah.  Me too.

See, our little munchkin has been having some digestive issues lately; in that he walks away from the pooping grounds with a dingleberry clinger, a poo-nugget, if you will.

The first time he brought his little friend inside and deposited it in the form of a poo smear on the carpet.

The second time Corey managed to dislodge it while still outside

Thank goodness.

And this last time, just last week, Oliver-dog took on the big boy responsibility of removing that little dangly crap nugget himself. 

What a big helper!

Only Oliver does not have hands.  Or fingers.  Or a plastic baggy to place over and protect anything that must go near that region.  He has his tongue.  That multipurpose tool he uses clean, eat, and collect pee scents from neighborhood shrubs.

Grrrreat.

So there I witnessed my nighttime cuddle-bug, hunched over, going to work on that turd like his life depended on it.

And maybe his life did depend on it.  Because how comfortable can it be to lay around all day with this thing just hanging out down there?

Anyway, to end a long story that could have been made very short about seven paragraphs ago, I ended up grabbing a piece of ice and stepping in to assist.  Successfully. 

However, I would say none of us walked away from that situation as winners.

But life-lessons were learned that day.

2 comments:

Kathryn said...

OMG, I just spit water all over myself. Sorry, I am not laughing at you :) Those are the worst though. I try to make sure that occurs outside, if possible. Never had one inside.

Who Does That said...

It makes me wonder...what are we putting in our mouths that make it so much dirtier than Oliver's??????