1. I would like to find a job that included nap time as a company policy.
2. My Friday nights are spent baking. Because I am a 75 year old grandmother.
3. I really do think those Reebok butt shapers will make me look like the girls in the commercials. "Who wears short shorts?" Well if I had those shoes I could, but I wouldn't because I like to set a good example for the younger pre-adolescents .
4. My friend had a baby last Thursday. She has since uttered the words "nipple confusion" and I am now concerned for all future conversations.
5. I really did walk around NYC on Sunday with my fly down. Again.
6. A driver's ed car went by my office on Tuesday. It was on a flat bed with a smashed front end. Oh how I laughed at the poor flunky's expense.
7. My parents taught me a harsh, humiliating lesson in stealing when I was three. I have never even considered taking so much as a dust bunny from any store, home, or baseball diamond since then.
8. I am in a hippie transformation process. I now only eat free-range chicken, grass fed beef and cage free eggs. I am also considering buying a Subaru and not wearing deodorant.
9. Tomorrow is the Kentucky Derby, one of Corey's favorite days. I will be walking the dog and eating nachos because I bring bad luck to horse racing and girl talk to boy time.
10. I ate dessert before dinner last night. And then again after dinner. Because I'm an adult.
6 comments:
I hope you're kidding about the Subuaru/deodorant thing. ;)
How did that whole "nipple confusion" thing turn out?
Great confessions! I ran across a blog last week (I loves me some blogs on living sustainably and frugality and such) that suggested using 1 part baking soda to 7 parts cornstarch as deodorant. I haven't tried it yet but it sounds interesting.
Then again, I'm much afraid these days that I've gone totally native.
I confess, I totally had no idea the derby was tomorrow. Where have I been? Now I have to watch it!
I ABSOLUTELY ADORE your HUMOR!!!!! Thank you so much for sharing your confesstion!!!!!
whoa whoa whoa...i am going to be a TRUE friend and tell you that the line needs to be drawn at not wearing deodorant.
you. are. welcome.
i am sorry i am so slow getting here, i had a fun busy weekend with my family. gotta live life a little. thanks for linking up!!
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