Random Pie

• Corey has been reading a book I bought for him.  It's about the pilot who landed a plane in the Hudson River.  I bought it for a buck at the book sale and he is not sure why the library would do such a thing.
• I buy cheap books.
• Sorry Borders.
• As much as I try to make a big lunch count as lunch and dinner, by 10pm my stomach revolts.
• But then I'm thankful for my lazy streak that keeps me from darting to the kitchen and eating shredded cheese by the fistful.
• Corey thinks I'm a certifiable weirdo.  I like to watch alien movies/TV shows.
• But seriously people, have you seen the new TNT series Falling Skies?  Gripping.
• Says the person who tapes Matlock movie marathons.
• My friend is interested in starting her own business and claims my behavior is screwing up the demographics.
• There are always outliers, my friends.  And I'm them.
• But sometimes I'm not: I wear a size 8 shoe.  As does most of the world.
• I've been known to sing the praises of fried foods by claiming even a fried turd would taste good, but to set the record straight I do not actually think this to be true.
• But I would like to see someone try.
• I think, though, the Department of Health frowns on this.
• You would think all these bullets are taking away from Friday's confessions.  They're not.  This week has been a doosy.
• It's only Wednesday.
• It's only Wednesday??
• I would very much like to reduce the circumference of my saddle bag area.  Corey helps by scooping out heaping mounds of ice cream over a quarter of a razzleberry pie.
• I, um, ate the whole pie.
• So I will start my diet next week.
• Diets are dumb.
• I think best this way.  All random.  It's probably why I've taken a liking to the twitters.
• I like it.  But that doesn't mean I know how to use it.
• You can find me at StacieJoLucas.  Clever.  I know.
• Corey?  No, he's not on the twitters.
• That's all.

Ten on Tuesday

1. What’s the recipe for your favorite drink? (Smoothie, alcoholic, coffee, whatever.)
Water.

Boring, I know.


2. What kind of razor do you use?
Gillette Quattro.  I like the heft of the thing, unlike the flimsy three blade Venus.

3. Who is your favorite Sesame Street character?
Grover.

"Near!....."

(music plays)

"Far!....."

Brilliant.

4. What makes the perfect salad? (Lettuce type, toppings, dressing, etc.)
Lots of toppings, the less room for greens the better: chicken, walnuts, pecans, beans, cheese, apples, pears, and pizza crust.

5. What was your favorite subject in school?
Art.  And in fourth and fifth grades I was forced to miss it because of glee club practice (it was required of those of us with a hint of singing ability).  I was less than pleased, and to this day I still wish I hadn't missed the project where you make a shape and repeat it over and over....see, I don't even know what the stinkin' thing is called, oh I'm so mad.

6. What’s your favorite summer tradition?
Going to camp on Lake Champlain.  Oliver swims his furry little heart out, we take walks, BBQ, fall asleep to lake noise (ie. drunk neighbors) and relax.  I'm relaxed just thinking about it.

Number two fave: mini-golf for my birthday.  19 days away.

7. Do you suffer from season allergies? How do you combat them?
Sometimes.  Last year, slight tickle.  This year, I may shove cotton balls directly into my sinus cavities.  And because I hate taking medicine (minus ibuprofen for debilitating lady pains) I just sit here, with my nose dripping into my business, and pray for rain to wash all the pollen away.

8. How often do you have to charge your cell phone?
I think I can go two days with light use, but I plug 'er in every night.  I never know when I'm going to have a painfully boring day and will need YouTube Matlock to keep me company.

9. Do you have a bucket list?
I've had a pretty eventful life, so if I did have one I'd probably fill it with "learn to knit," or "try oysters."

10. Do you have any desire to go back to school?
YES.  Always.  I loved school and since I've been out I feel like I'm getting stupid.  I'd like to learn new things and refresh the old stuff.  But not the mathematical old stuff, it's been pretty useless so far.

...

Happy Tuesday!  Thanks Chelsea for more of the random I love...

Mirror Lake Inn

Weekend Wrap Up: Getaway

I like getting away about as much as I like coming home afterward.

Sometimes you just need to leave, but then there is nothing like home...where your pjs live and you know where to find your favorite channels.

Oh, and snacks.  You've got readily available snacks at home.

But I digress.

This past weekend was Corey and my annual fancy trip to the Mirror Lake Inn in Lake Placid.

(Of Winter Olympics fame...not that horrible alligator movie)

He says hello.

Every year we drive up and plant ourselves in this cozy, charming, rustic, Adirondack lodge in the quaintest little village that you could never imagine holding tens of thousands of spectators the winter of 1980.

I use my spa gift card (it's a traditional stocking stuffer, thank you Corey!), we sit on the main porch and enjoy the Inn's tea time and then eat a whole lot in various places.

This past weekend was no different.

Except that maybe we ate more.  It ended up raining the entire time, so instead of grabbing a slice of pizza while walking through the village Saturday night, we hunkered down in Mirror Lake's restaurant and ate until the cows came home.

But in our defense, when food is good you tend to ignore the bulging seams of your pants for that one last bite....or entire slice of flourless chocolate cake in our case.

That night Corey found out exactly how much I like bluegrass.

A lot.  I like it a lot.  With or without a glass and a half of pino grigio....hypothetically speaking, of course.

On Sunday, after a morning workout (people, they give each bike, treadmill, elliptical, etc. their own TV!!) Corey joined me for a swim in the indoor pool before we met his parents for brunch.  A tasty brunch with fancy eggs and fancy jellies and itty bitty bottles of Tabasco sauce.

Then we all went back to our room to pack up, my mother-in-law swiped shower caps from the housekeeping trolley, and we checked out.

Wait...

When you need a shower cap... (shrugs shoulders)

Anytheft, because it was still raining we weren't able to spend much time walking through the village.  So we hit a few of our favorite stores (Bon, I'm living in my new pants today!) and then left Lake Placid.

But wait, I saved the best for last.

And because, um, that's just how it goes chronologically.

On the side of the road about 20 minutes outside of Lake Placid we found this place:

A teeny food trailer!  For giggles I almost asked where I could find the ladies room.

Please notice the table and chairs sitting just feet from The Road.  A BBQ bus it is not, but wacky nonetheless.

And the best roadside trailer food I've ever eaten.  I recommend the falafel; messy, but delish...and really messy.

They have, um, very lax hygiene policies.  But I will eat here again. 

Like next weekend.

So in summary, good, great, awesome weekend.  A+.  Bravo.



...and now I'm ready for another one.

What you missed this morning

"Beetle, come watch me water the tomato plant."

...

"Beetle!  Come watch me!"

"I have to watch you water it??"

"Yeah!  It's our plant!"

"...?"

"It's our plant, we nourish it.  We bring it to life.....so we can eat it."

Friday Confessions

1.  I have been working with a woman in another office over the phone for a few months now and have been calling her Taffy when recently I found out that her name might actually be Cathy.

"So Taffy, is that a nickname?"

"Well, my full name is Catherine, so..."

Oh Em Gee has she been saying CATHY this whole time??

2.  My boss's daughter was cleaning out her attic and wanted to give away her adorable little baby buggy, the same one I fell in love with when I first saw it two years ago.

So I took it.

Let the preggo rumors flow!

3.  But just to be clear: no bun in this oven.

Just a pram in the closet.

4.  Elton John is coming to the Saratoga Performing Arts Center in September.  I almost lost my marbles, but because I'm not sure I'll be able to afford a five million dollar ticket I have resigned to camping out on the lawn just outside the gate.

5.  Guilty pleasure, music edition: Elton John.

6.  If Neil Diamond was coming with him I would have had a heart attack.

7.  Oliver had a little bit of tummy troubles on Wednesday that had Corey and me on poop patrol:
 
"Did he poop."
 
"Yeah."
 
"How'd it look??"
...
 
"Did the dog poo?"
 
"He did.  Dark brown, soggy at the end...."
...
 
"How was the poop?"
 
"We're all clear."
 
Thank goodness that's over with.
 

8.  Our prized tomato plant:

"I swear it's gotten bigger since Sunday..."

9.  If we actually get tomatoes from this thing it will be because I had nothing to do with it.

10.  I kill plants.

For Corey

This is the man I married one year, nine months and five days ago.

(...and 11.5 hours if we really want to get technical.)

His name is Corey, Corey Lucas, and he's special.

When I have a busy night ahead of me, he takes on dinner, serves me and cleans up after me.

He makes sure we're on top of bills, car maintenance and dog food.

He wears his dark, trouser socks well into the night...after he's already changed into a pair of shorts.  Then he struts around because he knows how ridiculous he looks.

He hugs me when I'm mad, and when he knows the chances are pretty good that I'm going to smack him.

He makes decisions for two.

He now has the dog trained to perk up and run to the nearest window when sirens go by.  Every.  Single.  Night.

He knows what I like, and will surprise me with a brownie, cookies....or a pie and ice cream:

Now if I could just get him to play laser tag....

So you're saying it ISN'T Friday??

Raise your hand if you're just a tad bummed today is only Wednesday...

...

Ok, yeah.  Me too.

I thought we were supposed to have another weekend in here somewhere.

Whatever.

...

So, this week is dragging.

There's all these extra hours in the day, what am I supposed to do??

Don't get me wrong.  I love days that don't turn into night until my bedtime, but I'm a little thrown off as to my involvement in them.

I'm so tired....so tired...but the sun is still not officially down yet.  Must....stay....aw....

Luckily we have a big batch of nasty weather creepin' in.  That should give the next few days a more normal "start" and "stop" which should help me in feeling I should be up as long as the sun is.

...

And if I can drag this blog out any further the next thing we know it'll be Thursday...

Ten on Tuesday

1. What’s the perfect meal?

A never-ending supply of artichokes.  You could eat, like, a billion and not be full.  Seriously.  After scraping less than half of a half of a half-full bite from a couple dozen leaves you are left slightly less than not even close to being full.

There is probably a less confusing way to say that...

2. What are the perfect pair of shoes?
The comfort of a Dr. Scholl's with the look of a Jessica Simpson.

But who am I kidding.  I could never pull off a JS.

3. What is the perfect afternoon?
Lounging outside with my white legs in the sun reading a book.  Oliver laying quietly by my side not begging me every five minutes to walk him.  And Corey plopping brownie bites in my mouth while fanning me with a giant palm branch.

Oh, and no mosquitoes.

4. What’s the perfect house?
One with lots and lots of windows and enough land to house my retired race horses, alpacas and chickens.

I seem easy to please, but really that house should also have wide plank wood floors, a kitchen big enough for an island, a master bedroom with his and hers closets, jacuzzi tub, and a swirly slide that goes from the upstairs to the downstairs.

5. What is the perfect outfit?
I loves my black t-strap sandals with some leggins and a flowy top.

Because I can usually wear that combo to bed.

6. What’s the perfect wedding song?
At Last by Etta James has always been my favorite.  My bff beat me to the altar (by three years) so she used it as her first dance.  Corey and I danced to my other favorite, Frank Sinatra's The Way You Look Tonight.

7. What is the perfect job?
Making jewelry while raisin' babies, growin' veggies, planin' fundraisers and freelance ad/blog/website/logo design with an occasional commercial shoot on the side.

8. What’s the perfect hairstyle?
The kind that just Falls.  Into.  Place.

9. What’s the perfect music festival?
Um.  Music?  I don't do music...ever since that horrible Third Eye Blind Concert in 2000.

**shudder**

10. What’s the perfect day to yourself?
Shopping.  I would shop until my feet hurt.  Then I would go see a movie, a romantic comedy.  Afterwards I would find a coffee shop and read with an enormous java chip frapuccino or the equivalent.  Then I would go home and try on all of my goodies, put on my pjs and make pancakes for dinner.

...

Happy Tuesday!  Enjoy your first day of summer!!

Unless you're living in the southeast and southwest, in that case enjoy the AC.

Or if you're in Arizona, Texas or Nebraska, in that case seek shelter.

So, um, if you're in a good weather pocket, congratulations!

Weekend Update: Food and Fun

Thank goodness for sweet tasting glue strips on envelopes.  That's all I have to say.

But it's actually not.

You know me better than that.

It's Monday.  The day I tell you all the little details of Corey's and my weekend.

Like how we bought two tomato plants at the farmer's market.

But first, I start at the beginning.

Our hike.

It wasn't meant to be.

I said weeks ago that on Saturday Corey should choose for us to do one of two things: hike or golf.  He chose hike, picked the destination and scheduled us for a 7:45am departure time.  At 7:30am, as we were just waking up he suggested we get some breakfast instead.

Although I don't normally like to pass on an outdoor adventure, I had a hankerin' for home fries.  So we ditched our plans and went to Country Corner Cafe, just off the main street in Saratoga.

People, Cracker Barrel this place is not. Same country food, better country taste.  It's the kind of place out-of-towners flock to, which is why we were waiting along with parties of 9 and 12 to eat in a room the size of my bathroom.

Eventually we ate, we talked, we watched dogs walk by outside.  But before I move on to more interesting parts of the day I need to leave you with a mental picture of my breakfast, the Sunrise Benedict; two poached eggs over potato pancakes and roasted red peppers covered in hollandaise sauce.

Mmmmmm.....

After rolling ourselves down the stairs, across the street and into the car, Corey and I headed out to the farmer's market.

Where we bought two tomato plants.

For two people who don't eat tomatoes.

??

Yeah, we'll figure that part out later.  But right now we have two cute little green stalks with a couple 'a leaves sticking out and the promise of "jet star" sweet, less acidic tomatoes in 60-72 days.

We may or may not have spent several minutes, several times Saturday and Sunday just watching our little plant grow.  And I cannot guarantee we will not pick several teeny green pre-tomatoes out of excitement for having actually grown something edible.

We're city kids.

The rest of our afternoon (because it was afternoon by the time we were done running all around doing things you are not interested in) was less than exciting.  Corey browsed the latest in horse racing news.  I took a nap.

And then it was Father's Day...Yay!

Now, my sisters and I love our daddy, and we would have loved to take him to our favorite special occasion breakfast spot, but no amount of love was gettin' us in in under an hour and a half.  Everyone was there...eating our omelettes and apple cider donuts with their brothers, mothers, neighbors, aunties, friends, dogs, rabbits, owls, and office furniture.

So then we tried option two: our favorite every-other-day eatin' spot.  Packed to the gills. 

By the third try, your gramma's favorite diner because it's open when she wants it at 4am, we found a table in under 15 minutes.

I had the corned beef hash with eggs and potatoes...

Mmmmmm.....

We had ourselves a good little time, loved on our daddy, then it was on to the rest of the day.

In other words: laundry and a dog walk.

I also had to file my very first New York State sales tax form which was exciting and terrifying, but that's another story for another day...a day  in which I can find a way to make taxes less than the most boring subject ev-er.

And that's all the news that's fit to print.

Bye now.

Friday Confessions

1.  I did not think I would survive this week.

2.  But I did.  And now I have a weekend of fun things planned.  More on that Monday.

3.  Last night I played trivia at a bowling alley.  Good thing for questions like "list 10 of the last 21 'People's Sexiest Man Alive'" and "name the celebrity staring in the new reality series Why Not."  Otherwise I may not have had a chance to put my daily celebrity gossip updates to good use.

4.  I should add our team won and we had to split a $20 gift card between seven of us.

5.  While at the LARAC festival last weekend my sister slipped away to use the "vendor" bathroom in an office building (as opposed to port-a-potties for the general public).  When she came back she went into great detail on how nice and clean the bathroom was.

"It was so elegant...I wasn't dressed right!"

6.  In sixth grade I was on one of my school's basketball teams.  It was the team for kids who have to count out the steps in a lay-up.

I just thought you should know that about me.

7.  My dad and I are planning a pretty large fundraiser this summer.  I put together a binder with all of our information:

"Where is the binder?"

"It's the purple one in my purse."

"Oh, you mean periwinkle?"

My dad knows periwinkle.

8.  Guilty pleasure, food edition: Pizzeria Uno deep dish individual pizza.  That crust makes me melt.  It's so wrong it's right.

9.  On Saturday I was wondering aloud why certain pieces of my jewelry didn't seem to appeal to my age group.  My mom answered my out loud thoughts:

"You go on quilting retreats and watch Matlock."

10.  I am out of touch with my generation....sigh.  Anyone looking for a fourth for bridge?

...

Happy Friday!!

...And on a lighter note, It's Birthday Time!!

(yeah, seriously stace, why you gotta drag us down so early on a thursday??)

Today is my future brother-in-law's birthday!!

He's turning old today...Yay!!

Just kidding, 35 is not old.  And as the wife of a very active 39 year old, I have the authority to say that.

But as a nearly 29 year old I also have the authority to say I'm glad I'm not there yet.

Enjoy your day, Jay!

On Current Events

If you live anywhere in/near New York State or the other 49 states, minus probably Alaska, I sometimes wonder how much they know about what goes on waaaaaaay down here, you may have heard about this little piece of legislation that is coming up in our chambers today.

It's a same-sex marriage bill.  And the reason I'm thinking you've probably heard about it is because we've been getting your calls California.  And you too Nebraska, Missouri, Indiana, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, and Florida.

We've been getting so many calls the past three days the entire Senate phone and Internet system froze.

So many calls I couldn't post a Ten on Tuesday, for cryin' out loud!

It's kind of a big deal.

And despite my own personal views on the subject, I'm thinkin' this time it's going to pass.

**thinks quietly**

...

**thinks quietly some more**

...

**screws face into, "how do I say this without offending" look**

...

**wonders why she wore her "stinky" flops today when she knows they should be in the garbage**

...

I am against same-sex marriage.

(this is when corey opens his email and crafts a nasty-gram because he hates it when i get into this kinda stuff...um, anywhere)

(just kidding...he doesn't send nasty-grams.  just scold-a-grams.)

(which is probably necessary because there go my followers...)

Anyway, the point of this post is not to convert anyone to "my side" or to get on my soapbox and preach.

What I don't understand is why people have to get so ugly about it all.  On both sides.

"I too fear that those who preach marriage as the sole source of procreation lack the intellectual aptitude to raise children who will have a positive impact on society. Please go back to school to learn basic grammar and spelling - while you're at it, perhaps you'll pick up some tolerance!" (comment to newspaper article)

"They all (gay people) just need to be shipped to a deserted island!" (overheard conversation)

This is so sad.
 
That's all I really had to say: Have your opinions, but don't be ugly, people.

Weekend Wrap Up: craft festivals and torential downpour

Hello friends.  I'm back.

Back from the brink of exhaustion.

Not really the brink.  I was fully there.  This stress/anxiousness/sleep deprivation induced cold sore on my lip is proof.

But I'm back.  Because my first major craft show is over.  All that's left now is wrap up: figure out money and inventory stuff.  Load leftovers on Etsy.  Get every piece of jewelry out of my sight before I scream bloody murder.  I don't want to look at another piece of wool for at least a week.

That is, after I finish the three custom orders for four pieces.

But I digress.

The weekend was fun.  Rainy and dismal.  But fun.

The public still managed to come around.  They brought their jackets and umbrellas.

But to be honest, I was disappointed.  I wanted so badly for my very first show to be successful, and by my own wildly unrealistic standards it wasn't.

Some of the factors were out of my control.  Like the rain.  As hard as I tried to use my mental muscle to push the clouds out to sea I just couldn't make it happen.

And then there's the economy.  I'm not going to pretend to know what the heck this means, I just hear everyone else use it when things go wrong so I can assume I have a 50% chance of being correct when blaming lack-luster sales on "the economy."

But then there were things that I could have controlled.  Like the layout of my booth and its lack of whistles and bells.

Dangit Stacie!  Why did you forget the whistles and BELLS?!

But alas, I know what to do next time.

And now that I've had a day to recover, assess the damages and let my brain fog clear I can say there will be a next time.

I pretty much had that figured out, though, at the end of the show Sunday when I met a fellow jewelry maker who clued me into the world of trading.

"Wait, so I can buy your earrings by giving you a pair of mine??"

If only I had known about this when ordering my second crab cake sandwich, the one that cost me my entire profit for the weekend...

I'm only slightly exaggerating.

It was worth it.

Now, on to the goods:

I used a lot of things I had on hand and/or freebies for my props.  Like the driftwood I smuggled in my suitcase from my trip out to Washington.  Oh, and the little silver trays I collected at various garage sales.

These hair accessories went like hot cakes.  Like chocolate chip, Mickey Mouse shaped hot cakes.

This display is courtesy of Corey Lucas.  

I am most proud of this "bracelet stand."  Also previously known as two pieces of driftwood I found laying on the beach among others I also wanted and ended up kicking part of the way back to the house we were staying in because I just couldn't hang on to it all.

I painted my silver trays with chalkboard paint, swiped flowers from my mom's yard, and grabbed the milk glass from Mrs. Buck's house.  My parents' bought a lot of things, too, to help me out.  Like this pie shelf.  Which I hope to keep stocked with pies.  As was intended.

And these little bathing-lady figures you may see standing around.  They are the most darling little things...

Sometimes I call them my fat-bottomed girls.

They make my rockin' world go 'round.

Get on your bikes and riiiide!

But I digress.



I was happy to hear so many positive comments. 

"So pretty!"

"Very unique."

"I like this a lot."

"They look like moth balls."

And then, of course, there were a few who I would not consider fans.

But I'm pleased with the overall response.  Pleased enough to see what happens next year.

...

**Update: find more ideas from my 2012 show on my new craft blog here!

Friday Confessions

1.  There was a dark brown smudge on my finger last Friday and my first instinct was to lick it off.  This could have gone very badly.

2.  I assume brown = chocolate.

3.  It's a beautiful thing when your pants are too big.

4.  Especially when you've forgotten you accidentally bought them too big.

5.  While enjoying my pedicure and extreme callous removal over Memorial Day weekend, my guy hit a super sensitive part of my foot and I almost fell out of my chair laughing.  The girls in the other chairs were trying not to stare.

6.  I have sensitive feet.  Hovering several inches over them sends me into a rage of laughter.

7.  I may or may not have accidentally kicked Corey in the face after he dared to venture near my feet.

8.  I had my first jolt of espresso in several months on Wednesday.  Tall iced vanilla latte.  I could not stop talking.  Or smiling.  Or blinking.

9.  At Starbucks they get mad if you forget to tell them you wanted your drink "iced."

10.  As of post time, I will be perusing used literary treasures at our library's book sale.  This is a popular event among book collectors and people who aren't fond of antiperspirant, so finding last season's hottest read for 50 cents is not going to be as easy at it appears.

...

My craft festival starts tomorrow morning.  Oh.  Em.  Gee.  I am so nervous!

Desperate Plea

Oh my gooooosssshhhh.  Fellow bloggers: please stop.

Seriously, can you give me, like, 20 seconds to catch up before you post anything else??  I've been away from my computer, unable to soak in every word, ponder the conundrums of breast pumps and bottle rocket wars, and make thoughtful (yet odd, sorry) comments.

And I want to do all those things!  I need too.  Your news is my routine, and like my daily celebrity gossip fix, a la People online, it's as precious to me as wearing shoes in a public bathroom.

Can I tell you how gross I feel just standing in a public bathroom?  Don't even get me started.

But I digress.

Can you just feeeeeell the whining here?  Do exaggerated vowels convey that tooooone?

I'm doing my best to read it all, like actual read.  Which means I can only do a little at a time.  So, if you all were able to take, oh let's say, a half-day blog siesta that would do me a world of good.  Thanksomuch.

...

PS. Can someone fix Blogger so I can resume commenting?  For some of you I still am not able to leave my feedback, which I know is crucial to the development of your blog.  Please advise.

Weekend Wrap Up: Part II

And by "Part II" I mean this past weekend.  The one we just survived, barely.

(Part I was Memorial Day weekend.  Remember?  I couldn't be bothered to harass Blogger for not allowing me to post my pictures.)

Saturday/Sunday were also known as crunch time, because as I am just days away from my first big craft show I am in freak out mode to get everything done.  And by "everything" I mean the things I already have planned and the things I add to my to-do list daily.

In between activities, Corey scheduled us to attend a barbeque at our friend Scotty O'Dwyer's house.

Scotty O'Dwyer is actually his nickname.  I realize nicknames are not usually four syllables longer than the actual name, but it ain't my game.  Take it up with Corey.

AnyBBQ, we packed up our sausage roll and cake balls and headed out at 4:30pm for what I thought would be a few hours with friends, and a much needed break for me. 

Oh and a break it was; a seven hour one.  One that included every type of meat you can fit on a grill, a hot tub, six billion mosquitoes and four half glasses of wine.

I probably could have typed "two glasses of wine" but I drank them one half at a time, so...

Even two full glasses is one and a half glasses more than I have in a month, and I was feeling pret-ty relaxed.  I ate cake balls with wild abandon and may have made plans with Corey's cousin to find our way into the Bradley Cooper movie that's filming around here.

The wine then had the same affect on my sleeping as Benadryl does.  I was out within seconds of crawling in bed, and then woke up groggy and unsure of my name.  In no way was I sick (only two glasses, remember), but I was also not completely "there", and this followed me the rest of the morning.

Like to church.

Yes, I had an incident at church.  But let me preface it by saying I normally have a hard time paying attention to speakers in any topic or arena in perfect health and mental well-being.  College lectures were a nightmare.  You say learning disability, I say mind your own business.  Tomato, Tomato.

That saying actually doesn't work in print.

AnyEmbarrassingSituation, Corey and I sat down in the sanctuary and the sermon commenced.

What was it on, you ask?

Ummmm...errrrrr....wellll..... 

I could only half pay attention because I have been so sleep deprived for several weeks now and had groggy brain from the wine.  Eventually Pastor Bill came to a point in the sermon where I distinctively remember him saying:

"Stand up if you'd like to give glory to God."

I thought to myself, uh, yeah I 'd like to do that.

 I looked over at Corey, "Let's stand up."

He gave me a quizitive look and we stood.  But not everyone in the sanctuary did.  In fact, only half of the people stood up, and the ones sitting were clapping.

"Why isn't everyone standing?"

"...I don't know..."

Eventually we sit down and the pastor talks about hardships and difficult situations most people struggle with and I assume that's why we stood up: we had hardships at some point in our lives.  That's ok, I thought.  I got those.

So on we go with our day.

Brunch.

Stomach ache.

Jewelry.

Then I talked to my dad, who also attends the same church but went to the earlier service.

"Hey, remember when Pastor Bill asked people to stand up in church this morning?"

"Yeah."

"Um, what were they standing for?"

"That was for people who have conquered addictions."

"Get outta town."

"...??"

Oh dear sweet baby pandas what have I done.

I've let about 200 people speculate Corey and I met at a rehab clinic, that's what I've done.

Oh the embarrassment.

The shame.

The painful lesson that late nights and rabble-rousing may seem like fun at the time but have horrrrrible, embarrassing consequences.

But on another note: I was super productive, so...

Ten on Tuesday

Today's questions are on cell phones.  It figures at a time when I'm terrified of my cell phone, with news of possibly health problems linked to radiation from phone use and getting pulled over for the second time for talking and driving, I've gotta talk about the dang thing.  Sheesh!

But thanks anyway to Krys at Eat This Soup for coming up with something for us to talk about!

1. What type of phone do you have? Do you like it?
I have the first version of the Droid and this sucker has about had it.  Not only is it terribly bruised, but it's starting to freeze, and when I need to let Corey know there is a deer grazing on the side of the highway I'd better darn be able to.

2. How old were you when you got your first cell phone?
I was 16 and it was huuuuuuge.  I think I only had something like 40 minutes on my plan each month, so I could only use it when absolutely necessary.  Like telling all my friends that I had a celly and they didn't.

3. How many cell phones have you owned since your first?
I'm on my fifth.  And proud to say I have never owned a flip phone.

4. How much is your average monthly phone bill?
Much more than I'd like.

5. When you were a kid/teenager, were you allowed to have a phone in your room?
Kinda.  I think I could have, but I didn't want one.  I've never been much of a phone talker.  I actually dislike talking on the phone very much.

6. Do you like talking on the phone or do you despise it? Or somewhere in-between?
Whoopsie!  Guess who should have read the questions before she dove right in.

7. Do you text a lot? Is texting/talking while driving illegal where you live? Are you guilty of it anyway?
I don't text as much as a certain husband who shall remain nameless.  When talking to a Verizon rep:

"It looks like you don't need a large texting package.....oh, wait.  Yes you do."

Even touching a cell phone is illegal here.  But I do it anyway.  I talk.  Not text.

And I get caught.

8. What sort of texting keyboard does your phone have? Touch screen, slide out, or something different? Do you care?
Both, but I prefer to use the slide out keyboard.  It prevents such mistakes as "Wud bebop big deal."  I still don't know what this means.

9. Look at the last call in your call log – who is it? What were they calling about? Who calls you the most?
Corey.  He calls to check in every now and then.  Make sure I'm still alive.  This happens often.

10. What is the longest phone call you can recall having?
I've had 60+ minute conversations with Corey before we were married and living together.  And that's as far back as my memory goes.

...

Peace out.

Weekend Wrap Up: A Week Behind

True to form, I am a week behind on Memorial Day Weekend News.  My valid excuse: blogger would not accept my pictures.  It was one heckuva weekend.

And it started Friday with me, artist of the month, hanging out at the store where I sell my jewelry, meeting all of my three fans.

By "meet" I actually mean hanging out in the back of the store with the finger foods because I get super embarrassed by compliments.

And because I like to snack often. 

Highlights of the night:

• Food.
• Cupcake truck parked outside.
• I may have accidently served wine to minors.
• Met really fun people.

Up next: long hike up the highway to Corey's hometown for some fun in the sun out at camp!

And by "fun" I really mean wading through water to get to camp and standing on the deck saying, "ooooooh my gosh I can't believe all this water!"  We instead spent the rest of our time at his parents' house, on the porch, chattering on about all the goings on.

That is, until his mother, Bonnie, and I left to get our toes done.

A girl simply can't not get her toes done at least once in her life.  This time was actually my second, so I know from previous experience that my foot is not actually supposed to be rubbed raw, but boy do my nails look purdy.

Next I took a ride with the in-laws to one of the most fun houses I have ever been inside.  The most fun being Susan Feliciano's house on the corner of Olive and South in my old LBC neighborhood.  It may be because I was young the last time I was there, but that place had more nooks and crannies than an English Muffin.

Bad joke.  My apologies.

So off we go to the house of Bonnie's old friend, Olga, who unfortunately passed away earlier this year.  She was in her 90s.  Olga did not have children and only a few family members to pass treasures on to, so the rest of her belongings were scheduled for the dumpster.

I think this is tragic.  And I may have said so a few dozen times as we looked through old photo albums of relatives no one will ever know.  I would have l-o-v-e-d to have sat down with my grandmothers, looking through pictures of relatives long passed, and then taking those pictures to my children, all seven of them, and telling their stories, but I'll never have that chance.  So instead I settled on taking pictures of Olga's mother and father, their pictures were labeled and in places where they would be looked upon often, sparing them from a dirty, stinky fate.

She had a room full of sewing equipment, closet upon closest full of clothes, and a drawer of medical supplies from her husband's dental practice some 70 years ago.  To say I enjoyed learning about this woman through the stuff she collected is totally understated.  I wanted to go through every hat box, drawer, closet, but it would have taken hours and our lungs just weren't up to the dust.

So off we went, with a few treasures and a slight cough.

Even though we were having a good time, I was still there to get some work done on my jewelry (big craft fair coming up this weekend.)

My big helper stepped in.

Out of 1627 felt balls I needed for the show he rolled six perfect balls.  I was so proud!  And then I forced 13 more on him.  I believe he is now regretting this move from business manager to assembly worker.

Too late for that, Cor.

Oliver had a great time.  Although he wasn't able to get his annual romp in Lake Champlain he did avoid a horrible rash on his undercarriage from floating duck poo and cutting open his paws on zebra mussels.  And he had a cat to stalk.

This cat.

He is as friendly as he looks.  As in, not at all.

I may or may not have used an unrolled sleeping bag as a buffer when trying to pass him in the hall to avoid being mauled.

Oliver is much braver.  They stood face to face.  His ears were perked with an invitation to run and play and eat out of each other's bowls.  Kitty just stared and growled.

Funny how animals understand each other's signals, even if they're part of a different species.

Can't fault a brother for trying.  But I wouldn't mention that to the cat.

Corey and I were a little bummed at not being able to barbeque at camp, wake up to water lapping on the shore, and consuming flaming marshmallows covered in chocolate and graham cracker.  But the weekend redeemed itself, and we were pleased as punch to spend time with family.

...

In the next Weekend Wrap Up: why four half glasses of wine may cause you to do something embarrassing in church the next day.

Friday Confessions

1.  It's Friday, again, and I have very little to confess.

2.  I've been saintly all week.

3.  And/or have forgotten all the things I wanted to share.

4.  Sometimes I catch myself making faces when I am frustrated, annoyed, excited, etc.  And I mean really screwy faces I would be embarrassed to know strangers saw.

5.  Striped fitted sheets mean the world to me.  They say, with no words at all, "this end up or down but not side to side," saving me several moments of frustration trying to stretch the short end to fit the long end, and then rotating it, and then rotating it again because I realized I just needed to stretch it a little farther the first time.

6.  Corey saves himself the frustration by leaving the sheet however it falls.

7.  Guilty pleasure, in my car when no one is watching edition: I take my shoes off and put my toes up to the AC vents.  Usually just my left foot.  It feels magical.

Also, singing and dancing would fit into this category.  Although I'm less concerned if someone sees dancing than holding my foot at face level.

...

Aaaaaand that's a wrap.  Happy Friday!

Pre-Weekend Wrap Up

I very much would like to share the events of Corey and my weekend away, camping under the lamps of his parents' living room, (mainly because I think you will be interested, but also partly because I know very soon I will forget) however Blogger is rejecting all of my pictures.

Not that there were too many, just four that were to be accompanied by a ton of words.

But alas, not today.

(sigh)