Asparagus: Always the Answer

I am in the middle of what I like to call Brain Funk.

It's when I don't eat my veggies and my brain is unable to make connections to big words I used to know, such as superfluous.

What the heck does that mean?  I remember using it just last week.

Or maybe that was in a college paper...before my brain literally shrunk in size.  Shrunk...shrunck...schruhnk...

During Brain Funk I like to sit and stare.  Without moving.  For hours.

And then I try to do the things I am paid to do, like write letters on subjects I know nothing about.  But the kind of brain power it takes to pull such BS outta nowhere is beyond me.  So I sit and stare.  At my computer.  For hours.

I do think when I'm staring.  About lunch.

Or about the cake sitting in our dirty office kitchen put there by our sloppy office neighbors.

I think about how I can sneak a piece and, surprisingly, my thoughts are clear and concise.

But as my brain is still connected to my arms and legs, the funk does not allow me to move them as stealthily as would be necessary to swipe a piece of Beth's birthday cake without anyone noticing.

So I think about other things.

Maybe I'll cut my fingernails when I get home.

I'm Jimmy McMillen...breakfastlunchanddinner.

Why is it I can only breathe out of one nostril at a time...?

Did Zack and Kelly like each other for real?

I'm not sure I can pull off the jean jacket look.

This is brownie weather.

And so on.  For hours.

Luckily, I have about 5 bags of frozen veggies ready to be steamed in my microwave.  And if I eat all five between dinner and breakfast I may be 1) green, 2) the smartest person you know, or 3) still in a brain funk because lack of veggies was not the problem.

We'll see how it goes.